Turning Thirty - Minfong Ho

1. With close reference to the text, explain how Beverly fails as a mother and as a daughter in law(8m)

Beverly's failure as a mother:

• Billy is closer to the maid, Rosa, than his own mother
• When Billy was crying in the bathtub while being bathed by the Old One, he screamed for Rosa instead of his mother

• Beverly declines to get her hands dirty to care for Billy
• When Billy splashed about while crying in the bathtub, Beverly stepped away to avoid having her silk blouse wet by soapsuds

• Beverly occasionally uses Billy like a toy, something to show off
• Beverly plays with Billy only in front of her colleagues to paint herself as a doting mother
• Beverly dresses up Billy in a mini-suit for Ah Liong's birthday even though it makes him look ridiculous

Beverly's failure as a dughter-in-law:

• Beverly refuses to acknowledge the seniority of her mother-in-law
• According to Chinese tradition, the younger generation should first serve the elders at the dining table. However, Beverly declines to serve the Old One for the sake of her pride.
• Beverly still refuses to deign even when Ah Liong tries to convince her to do so

• Beverly does not care about her mother-in-law
• When Billy was crying in the bathtub, Beverly pushed aside the Old One to get closer to him. Considering that the Old One is arthiric, Beverly really shouldn't treat her with the gentleness of a bulldozer.

• Beverly is uncompromising to her mother-in-law's beliefs and traditions
• She forces the Old One to move the altar away from the living room in order to install a new CD player and sound amplifiers 
• She insists that the Old One light up her joss sticks only after she has left for work

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2. Explain how Ah Liong compromises to keep the harmony within the family* (8m)

• CD player and amplifiers
• Beverly wishes to install a new CD and amplifiers in the living room at the exact spot where the family altar is located. Hence, the altar is moved to the Old One's bedroom.
• Ah Liong initially argues against the decision citing family tradition as well as his mother's feelings
• However, he backs down when the argument gets heated to prevent further conflict

• Serving food to elders
• Ah Liong requests Beverly to first serve his mother during meal time as a gesture of respect but Beverly refuses
• Ah Liong does not make any further action to encourage his wife 

• Birthday party
• When Beverly tells Ah Liong about the party she is organizing for him, Ah Liong shows his displeasure at the ostentatious lifestyle his wife is making him live
• Beverly insists that the party will be held whether he likes it or not
• Ah Liong doesn't want to argue about it any further ("Have it your way, Bev. You always do anyway." -Ah Liong)

• Confronting the Old One about the video camera
• Ah Liong caught his mother trying to replace the video camera back into the desk. He initially tries to lecture his mother(albeit, gently) but his mother snaps back and scolds him about his lifestyle choices in relativity to his maid's wretched life. The two of them are interrupted by an intruding Beverly.
• Beverly finds that the video camera has be located and demands where it came from.
• Ah Liong makes the decision to lie to his wife and manages to please his mother, despite his conscience 

3. Showing respect for elders is very important in family relationships.Discuss with close reference to the text.(12m)

Evidence:

Ah Liong

• Ah Liong respects his mother to no bounds
• He buys his mother a three thousand dollar jade bracelet when he got his first job as a token of respect and gratitude to all her sacrifices
• He invites and guides his mother by the arm to dinner
• He serves his mother first at the dining table as a gesture of respect even though he is the head and breadwinner of the family
• He argues on behalf of his mother about moving the altar away from the living room to make space for the new CD player and amplifiers
• He does not respond rudely and instead gently explains when his mother attacks his lifestyle and choices (in the scene where he confronts her in his study when she is about to put the camera recorder back in its place)
• He respects and listens to his mother's advice despite him being legally correct and changes his stance on the camera recorder. Thus, we see that Ah Liong is willing to put himself(and Beverly) aside for his mother

Beverly

• Beverly makes her choices based on her wants and needs without consideration towards other people
• She does not hide her disdain towards joss sticks and pointedly asks the Old One to only light them while they are away
• She also forces the altar away from the living room in order to install a new CD player and amplifiers, breaking the Old One's tradition of having Kuan Yin Pusa at the center of their living space ("She has always occupied a central place wherever we lived," -Ah Liong)
• She physically pushed aside the Old One to get closer to Billy as he cried in the bath
• She refuses to show respect even in the simplest ways by serving her mother-in-law first at the dining table. She considers the tradition an insult to her dignity.

Analysis:

• The elder generation must be respected
• Showing respect for elders is very important
• Our elders have achieved more and suffered more than we have
• It is only fair to give them respect and consideration
• Respecting elders also puts everyone back in place and preserves the family hierarchy 

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Bugga's Note:

Considering that one of the themes in this short story is compassion, do note down all examples where compassion is shown by the characters. This would help you to provide evidence(and score marks) especially in Type-C questions.

I'll be the first to admit that I myself had forgotten to include two vital pieces of evidence regarding compassion in the SPM paper itself: in which Ah Liong compassionately represented the homeless drunk and the teen mother.